The most bizarre opening line for a story I’ve ever written.

Captain Picard and the Enterprise have been returned safely to the toy box. I await first-pass pages for Peaceable Kingdoms to arrive sometime early next month. Between now and then, I have a couple of sets of interview questions to answer, a guest blog or two to write, an outline for the next novel, and a synopsis for a Very Cool Project.

There’s also a short story I’ve been promising I’d write for an anthology with the working title F*cked Up Fairy Tales, so as you might imagine, the book has a very unconventional set of guidelines. Anyway, for me, it’s now or never, yo. I’ve had it up on the screen the past few hours as I ponder various twists and turns while tending to other items on my “To Do List,” in the hopes that I can figure out something that will measure up to this, the story’s opening line:

Peter knew shit was getting out of hand even before Captain Hook snapped Tinker Bell’s G-string.

In related news, Hell called to let me know that my reservation’s confirmed. King bed, corner room with a view overlooking the lava flows.

Sweet.

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About Dayton Ward

Freelance word pusher. Husband. Dad. Trekkie. Rush fan (the band). Tampa Bay Bucs fan. Observer/derider of human behavior. I know where my towel is.
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10 Responses to The most bizarre opening line for a story I’ve ever written.

  1. H.E. ELLIS says:

    Too awesome for words. Sad you couldn’t do a Star Trek version like this…

    …or have you? 😉

    Like

  2. liquidcross says:

    You might as well retire. Zenith reached!

    Like

  3. JeffDJ says:

    Ha-ha, awesomely twisted. Looking forward to reading it.

    Like

  4. Terry J. Erdmann says:

    I’m commenting here only to let you know how DISGUSTED I am at having seen your words. You should be ashamed of yourself! Not finish the damned story and post it so that I can retain this marvelous feeling of disgust. (I never knew before just how enticing this feeling could be. Ooooh, it’s disgusting!)

    Like

  5. Dave Steinberg says:

    Please remove me from your mailing list. I’m a Christian and I cannot, with a clear conscience, keep reading/receiving the kind of trash talk. I wonder how you explain your job to your children. Here’s hoping you find Jesus for a much better life. I do care enough to pray for you and yours, Dayton.

    Like

    • Dayton Ward says:

      Well, here’s the thing: I didn’t add you to any mailing list, nor do I maintain any such lists. If you’re here, it’s because of actions you took to receive updates/notices about any postings to this space. I’m also unable to “remove” or “block” anyone who receives updates from this blog via eMail.

      Of course, every time you’ve chosen to visit, you should’ve seen this disclaimer right at the top of the page:

      I understand that I’m not everyone’s cup of tea, and you’re obviously free to stop receiving updates at any time. Go to your follow/email subscription settings for WordPress and remove me from the list of feeds you receive.

      Like

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