The following may contain offensive language. Proceed at your own peril.
(410): so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM… he is my new hero.
(859): Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing everywhere. He is my hero.
(609): So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up.
(1-609): i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one.
(248): So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren’t mine…
(301): please come get me his dick is out. i’m sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now.
(203): sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
(626): and that’s why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.